Next manager for Manchester City...
'Arry.
Positives: Good "wheeler dealer" in the transfer market
Negatives: Dodgy knees. Wants a cut from all the transfer income on sale of players because he "developed" them. His pet dog's offshore bank account.
Avram Grant
Positives: Got to the Champions League Cup Final and League Final with Chelsea, FA Cup Final with Portsmouth and the African Nations Final with Ghana.
Negatives: Was runner up in the Champions League Cup Final and League Final with Chelsea, FA Cup Final with Portsmouth and the African Nations Final with Ghana. Also has a fondness for "massages" from ladies of negotiable affection.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1248650/Avram-Grant-Thai-massage-brothel.html Klopp
Positives: Won loads of trophies.
Negatives: Faced relegation this year. Believes his own hype and has his head stuck up his own hole. Hates Manchester City.
Mark Hughes
Positives: Young, upcoming British Manager.
Negatives: He's shit.
Ian Holloway
Positives: Young, upcoming British Manager. He's a "character".
Negatives: He's shit.
Sam Allardyce
Positives: Young, upcoming British Manager. He's a modern football manager into stats, technology, nutrition and shit.
Negatives: He's shit.
What we need is an experienced manager who can handle a rag tag of fucking prima-donnas from all corners of the world, has a proven track record in Europe against stiff competition, smooth operator with the media and will have the respect of everyone.
I have the answer.
Michael Caine.
He did a great job in Escape To Victory and he can do the same for City! The campaign starts here!
Pellers Out! Caine In!