Manchester City Forums

This is a discussion forum for Manchester City Football Club fans
It is currently Fri Mar 29, 2024 1:51 am

All times are UTC




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 54 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next
Author Message
 Post subject: World Cup Jokes
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 10:14 am 
Offline
Junior Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 10:07 am
Posts: 2471
Location: Huddersfield, West Yorkshire (originally from denton mcr)
Ive had a glut of jokes sent to me since the world cup started so I shall start the ball rolling

"Give £2 a month to a starving african and what do they do? They buy a fucking trumpet"

_________________
[SIZE="3"][color="Black"][font="Century Gothic"]مدينة [تيل] يموت أنا[/font][/color][/SIZE]


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 10:22 am 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 3:31 pm
Posts: 11033
Location: Mancunia
Image

_________________
'Fabio, the round thing there is the ball'

Aguero


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 10:28 am 
Offline
Junior Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 10:07 am
Posts: 2471
Location: Huddersfield, West Yorkshire (originally from denton mcr)
Timpblue wrote:
Image


"FOR SALE.
One pair of genuine robert green goalkeeping gloves as worn during the England V USA match, unused...."

_________________
[SIZE="3"][color="Black"][font="Century Gothic"]مدينة [تيل] يموت أنا[/font][/color][/SIZE]


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 11:53 am 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 1:38 am
Posts: 11713
Location: Perth, Western Australia
England.

That is all

_________________
Posting Bi-Monthly These Days

I was born with "
methemoglobinemia"


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 12:56 pm 
Offline
Junior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 12:56 pm
Posts: 4183
Location: Barcelona
What a twunt, sorry miggs/Danny, but based on Germany beating a piss poor Aussie side with ten men for the second half, isnt a massive bragging right!

Germany legend Franz Beckenbauer has been scathing in his criticism of England's playing style after their opening game at the World Cup.
While Fabio Capello's team laboured to a 1-1 draw with the United States, Germany crushed the Australians 4-0.
The former German captain, 64, said: "What I saw of the English against the US had very little to do with football.
"It looked to me as if the English have gone backwards into the bad old days of kick and rush."

Joachim Loew's German team have been one of the most impressive so far in South Africa, with the German newspaper, Bild, declaring: "We're going to blow you all away," after the opening win in Durban.

England, meanwhile, are hoping for an improvement in their forthcoming games against Algeria and Slovenia as, if they finish second in Group C, they could face the Germans in the second round.
Germany currently top Group D after their demolition of Australia but they still have to face Ghana and Serbia.

Beckenbauer, who captained his country to World Cup victory in 1974 and was the manager when they won in 1990, believes England's problems are the result of a shortage of talent in the Premier League.
"I am not sure if the England coach Fabio Capello can still change much there," he told South African newspaper the Times.

"The English are being punished for the fact that there are very few English players in the Premier League as clubs use better foreign players from all over the world."
Capello would no doubt prefer to see more English players in the domestic top flight, but questions have also been raised regarding the team's lack of preparation with the new Jabulani ball being used in South Africa.
The ball has been used in domestic football in Germany, France and Argentina since February, but not in England.

Altitude is another factor that has been affecting England's squad, with defender John Terry admitting last week that the players were taking time to adapt to the conditions.

England are based in Rustenburg, 1,403m above sea level, while Germany are playing their games at sea level in Durban.

_________________
Venga City, Venga city !


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 1:04 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 1:38 am
Posts: 11713
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Its all good. I get a feeling Verbeek played a wank side as he knew he wouldnt get anything out of it regardless and rested the key players for the must win games against serbia and ghana.

_________________
Posting Bi-Monthly These Days

I was born with "
methemoglobinemia"


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 1:48 pm 
Offline
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu May 15, 2008 7:42 am
Posts: 5801
Miggs wrote:
Its all good. I get a feeling Verbeek played a wank side as he knew he wouldnt get anything out of it regardless and rested the key players for the must win games against serbia and ghana.


is Bresciano still playing Internationally? Remember City nearly getting him a couple of times under Sven

_________________
[color="Silver"]Bring back the 8 Ball![/color]


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 2:02 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon May 05, 2008 1:38 am
Posts: 11713
Location: Perth, Western Australia
cooder wrote:
is Bresciano still playing Internationally? Remember City nearly getting him a couple of times under Sven


He is. Was left out of the team but should be back next game. I dont personally rate him at club level. But hes decent enough for the soccerwhos

_________________
Posting Bi-Monthly These Days

I was born with "
methemoglobinemia"


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 2:09 pm 
Offline
Junior Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 10:07 am
Posts: 2471
Location: Huddersfield, West Yorkshire (originally from denton mcr)
I am hoping we get the krauts in the next round and send them back home tail between the legs.....

" Well, huzzah and hurrah! God Save the King, Rule Britannia,
and Boo Sucks the Hairy Hun!"

Lieutenant George - Blackadders goes forth

_________________
[SIZE="3"][color="Black"][font="Century Gothic"]مدينة [تيل] يموت أنا[/font][/color][/SIZE]


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 2:13 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 3:31 pm
Posts: 11033
Location: Mancunia
as i said on a previous thread, i will take this criticism from zidane or platini or cruyf or even maradona. but a german? criticising someone for playing unattractive football?
fuck off

_________________
'Fabio, the round thing there is the ball'

Aguero


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 2:29 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu May 01, 2008 12:51 pm
Posts: 14495
Location: Heaven
Timpblue wrote:
as i said on a previous thread, i will take this criticism from zidane or platini or cruyf or even maradona. but a german? criticising someone for playing unattractive football?
fuck off


He's slagging England off, not for playing unattractive footy, but for playing caveman footy.

_________________
And put on that wig I bought you. No, no, no, no. The reddish-brown one.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:06 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 3:31 pm
Posts: 11033
Location: Mancunia
slart wrote:
He's slagging England off, not for playing unattractive footy, but for playing caveman footy.


cos the krauts never did that as they bored the living arse off people for the last thirty years

_________________
'Fabio, the round thing there is the ball'

Aguero


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:09 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 7:50 pm
Posts: 24256
Location: Australia
Timpblue wrote:
cos the krauts never did that as they bored the living arse off people for the last thirty years


Angry Timps today huh?

I got some text about, 'whats difference between Robert Green and BP, Robert Green can at least spill it and get a cap'....yada, yada, yada. Not funny.

_________________
KYPU


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:14 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu May 01, 2008 12:51 pm
Posts: 14495
Location: Heaven
Timpblue wrote:
cos the krauts never did that as they bored the living arse off people for the last thirty years


I have to say I've always liked watching the Germans. They may not have the top quality players they had in the 80s and early 90s but they have always produced quality international teams.

They'll make shite of England if they meet in the later stages.

_________________
And put on that wig I bought you. No, no, no, no. The reddish-brown one.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:15 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 3:31 pm
Posts: 11033
Location: Mancunia
nah, just the cheek of the germans

loads of crap jokes going around

plus i have to work looking out on loads of people watching football on a big screen with a bar and deli counter in manchester

:(

_________________
'Fabio, the round thing there is the ball'

Aguero


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:34 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 7:50 pm
Posts: 24256
Location: Australia
My boss has been pretty good so far, considering he hates football. That may change.

Yes, Australia is garbage at football but I do think German one is very decent. They were outplayed by Spaniards in Euro 2 years ago but they're younger now, I've never actually had a problem with them. I fear your England side will get stifled before long after group stages my boy. Dont have anywhere near the confidence and team guile that other good teams do. Portugal dont look great either, and Italy look purty crap.

_________________
KYPU


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 4:07 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2008 9:49 am
Posts: 19610
Location: Kent
Stat from the Ivory Coast Portugal game - there were 31 fouls committed and only 26 successful tackles made.

God I hate the modern game.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 4:15 pm 
Offline
Senior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 3:31 pm
Posts: 11033
Location: Mancunia
slart wrote:
He's slagging England off, not for playing unattractive footy, but for playing caveman footy.


this

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/philmcnulty/2010/06/is_beckenbauer_right_about_eng.html

_________________
'Fabio, the round thing there is the ball'

Aguero


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 4:17 pm 
Offline
Junior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 12:56 pm
Posts: 4183
Location: Barcelona
Another Joke - FIFA

Looking at the outfits, it just looks like a big hen party and no named brewery! Plus dont all dutch supporters wear Orange?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/world/africa/10321668.stm

Fifa is considering legal action against a Dutch brewery it accuses of using women fans to advertise its beer at the World Cup.

Stewards ejected 36 Dutch supporters from Monday's match between the Netherlands and Denmark midway through the second half in Johannesburg.

All were dressed identically in tightly hugging short orange dresses, sold as part of a gift pack by a Dutch brewery.

A brewery representative dismissed Fifa's concerns as "ridiculous".

The Cup's authorised beer is Budweiser which pays millions of dollars for the privilege.

With a large chunk of Fifa's revenue coming from selling marketing rights, it vigorously pursues anyone who tries to associate themselves with the tournament, the BBC's Jonah Fisher reports.

Earlier this year a local low-cost airline was forced to withdraw an advertising campaign which boasted that it was the "Unofficial National Carrier of the You-Know-What".
'Clear ambush'

The women, seated near the front, were picked up by TV cameras.

"What seems to have happened is that there was a clear ambush marketing activity by a Dutch brewery company," said Fifa spokesman Nicholas Maingot.

"What we are doing actually at the moment is that we are looking into all available legal remedies against this brewery."

Mr Maingot said that none of the women had been arrested.

However, they were reportedly taken to a Fifa office where police quizzed them about the dresses and asked if they worked for the brewery, Bavaria.

Bavaria board member Peer Swinkels told Reuters news agency that Fifa's reaction was "ridiculous".

"Fifa does not have the monopoly on orange and people have the freedom to wear what they want," he said.

_________________
Venga City, Venga city !


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 4:20 pm 
Offline
Junior Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 02, 2008 12:56 pm
Posts: 4183
Location: Barcelona
Danny's Studs wrote:
My boss has been pretty good so far, considering he hates football. That may change.

Yes, Australia is garbage at football but I do think German one is very decent. They were outplayed by Spaniards in Euro 2 years ago but they're younger now, I've never actually had a problem with them. I fear your England side will get stifled before long after group stages my boy. Dont have anywhere near the confidence and team guile that other good teams do. Portugal dont look great either, and Italy look purty crap.


Your making a big assumption that we will get out of the group! :whistle:

As for Spain, the jury is still out and a lot depends on Torres being fit.

Germany, have to show that they can do the same against tougher opposition.

Argentina is still my tip, even if the coach is tw@.

_________________
Venga City, Venga city !


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 54 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 9 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group