Manchester City Forums :: View topic - Help!! Best Man speech ideas.

And dont suggest they call the sprog Stevie

"Thank you to Father O'Shaughnessy for conducting a lovely ceremony and for not molesting any of the usher boys..." laughter break... "YET!".... laughter break... "Bet it made a nice change to see someone ELSE signing the register!" laughter break... "no but seriously I've known Paul for years and have been around during all key moments in his love life, beginning when he lost his virginity at the age of 15 but you'll have to ask him about that... or Father O'Shaughnessy!"... laughter break - don't the bridesmaids look lovely, toast to the couple etc, sit down to rapturous applause. #jobsagoodun.

I lost the rings didn't i.

Stopped the wedding for 15 minutes whilst i was desperately looking for them, total wreck i was.

Only joking

Everything went great, i gotta few laughs but a few groans with the hope your marriage lasts longer than a Liverpool title challenge.

Me and the Groom looking dapper.

Bert Trautmanns neck brace wrote:

And dont suggest they call the sprog Stevie

Now i must get in a slight dig about Liverpool.

How about hope their marriage lasts longer than Liverpools title hopes????

Author:	South East Citizen [ Wed Jun 18, 2014 2:41 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
"Thank you to Father O'Shaughnessy for conducting a lovely ceremony and for not molesting any of the usher boys..." laughter break... "YET!".... laughter break... "Bet it made a nice change to see someone ELSE signing the register!" laughter break... "no but seriously I've known Paul for years and have been around during all key moments in his love life, beginning when he lost his virginity at the age of 15 but you'll have to ask him about that... or Father O'Shaughnessy!"... laughter break - don't the bridesmaids look lovely, toast to the couple etc, sit down to rapturous applause. #jobsagoodun.

Author:	Bastard [ Wed Jun 18, 2014 7:18 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Cheers SEC. There's definitely stuff in there I can work with. Gal - don't forget to include laughter breaks.

Author:	Gallagheresque [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 6:36 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Fucking T minus 24 hours FFS!!! I added more last night. Good afternoon everyone. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Gary, Alan's Best Man. I would like to thank Jennifer, Alan and their families for inviting us to celebrate their marriage with them on this beautiful day. The large turnout in this room is truly a testament to the love, that we together have for Jennifer and Alan as well as the love they have for each other. Thank you to all those who have made it here today. I am especially glad to be here on this occasion to celebrate this wonderful day with my friend. Jennifer, I have gotten to know you since you met Alan and I am so proud of my Best Friend that he has married such a caring, beautiful, warm, loving girl like yourself. Ladies like you don’t come along too often in life and I mean the word “lady” in every sense, you are the perfect couple.” I've known Alan for over 15 years (Look at Jen) Good luck. We met over our mutual love of music, More than just a long-time friend who has always been there for me, Alan is one of the finest people I have had the privilege to know. He’s honest, sincere, loyal and intelligent. During our 15 years of friendship we have had good times, and great times, and yes, that does include Wednesday nights at Darcys, when you have a moment you want to ask alan about that. I remember the first time we went to Norwich and we hired a boat out for the day. Alan was driving like a man possesed, all of 5 mph, nearly had me out of the boat a few times, we decided to moor up outside this pub, stop off and have something to eat. So i get out, moor up the boat and start wandering into the pub thinking Alan was following behind. Must have been in there about 2 minutes and thought it strange Alan hadn't come in yet, so i go outside and notice he is still sat in the boat, engine running, asked if he was ok he just said, i don't know how to switch the engine off, bit baffled i asked if he had removed the key out of the ignition, he had but boat was still running, so were both sat in this moored up boat scratching our heads wondering how to turn the engine off, almost 10 minutes must have passed when a couple got into their boat opposite, so Alan asked if they knew how to turn the engine off, turns out you had to pull out a lever that was right next to the ignition so, when alan finally managed to turn off the engine,he got a nice round of applause from the people sat outside the pub. This is a guy who wants to drive trains!!! Apart from being a brilliant artist, Alan has a bit of songwriting in him. Just going back to our love of music, there was a moment we thought we could be the next Lennon and McCartney, we'd write songs and record them, me on guitar, Alan on Bass and a drum machine. Alan was obsessed about putting an echo on almost everything we did which i've never understood to this day, to this day, to this day, to this day.. Over a few weeks We had about 10 maybe 12 songs when one day out of the blue, Alan had decided to send a CD of our songs to be reviewed, now these were pretty rough demos at best. About 2 weeks after sending off these songs Alan called me and asked if i'd seen the music reviews as our songs where on there, i'll be honest i was kind of dreading it but i was going to look anyways...............One and a half out of 5.......could have been worse. That's where we thought, maybe were more Robson and Jerome than a Lennon and McCartney and called it a day. That's enough from me i think. I'd like you all to raise your glasses now and join me in wishing Jennifer and Alan all the very best on their marriage and may it be a very long and happy one. To Jennifer and Alan, thank you. I'd also like to propose a toast to the chief Bridesmaid and bridesmaids who i think you'll all agree look beautiful.

Author:	Khabom [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 6:53 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Looks good - just need to include a cautionary tale about getting married when you've only known the bint for 10 months.

Author:	Bert Trautmanns neck brace [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 6:58 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
And dont suggest they call the sprog Stevie

Manchester City Forums http://www.mancityforum.co.uk/forum/

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Author:	Gallagheresque [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 7:12 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Bert Trautmanns neck brace wrote: And dont suggest they call the sprog Stevie Now i must get in a slight dig about Liverpool. How about hope their marriage lasts longer than Liverpools title hopes????

Author:	gibbonicus_andronicus [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 1:11 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
say you'll see everyone next year for the divorce party

Author:	BiscuitBlueCheese [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 11:51 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Where's Gal I can't sleep without knowing how his speech went down

Author:	South East Citizen [ Sat Jun 21, 2014 11:54 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Tonight isn't it? Who gets married on a Friday.

Author:	gibbonicus_andronicus [ Sat Jun 21, 2014 12:22 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
The unemployed/scousers?

Author:	NoddytheAdlingtonBlue [ Sun Jun 22, 2014 6:28 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
South East Citizen wrote: "Thank you to Father O'Shaughnessy for conducting a lovely ceremony and for not molesting any of the usher boys..." laughter break... "YET!".... laughter break... "Bet it made a nice change to see someone ELSE signing the register!" laughter break... "no but seriously I've known Paul for years and have been around during all key moments in his love life, beginning when he lost his virginity at the age of 15 but you'll have to ask him about that... or Father O'Shaughnessy!"... laughter break - don't the bridesmaids look lovely, toast to the couple etc, sit down to rapturous applause. #jobsagoodun. Maybe get one of those telescopic magnet things and stick a mirror on the end. Bring it out and mention you wanted to check under the wedding car 'just in case' to great comedic effect Need some BNP shit in there for the grooms family too. Maybe black up?

Author:	Gallagheresque [ Sun Jun 22, 2014 8:31 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
I lost the rings didn't i. Stopped the wedding for 15 minutes whilst i was desperately looking for them, total wreck i was. Only joking Everything went great, i gotta few laughs but a few groans with the hope your marriage lasts longer than a Liverpool title challenge. Me and the Groom looking dapper.

Author:	South East Citizen [ Sun Jun 22, 2014 10:26 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Gallagheresque wrote: I lost the rings didn't i. Stopped the wedding for 15 minutes whilst i was desperately looking for them, total wreck i was. Only joking Everything went great, i gotta few laughs but a few groans with the hope your marriage lasts longer than a Liverpool title challenge. Me and the Groom looking dapper. I reckon you might be hearing from Robson and Jerome's solicitors.

Author:	kippax_in_my_blood [ Sun Jun 22, 2014 10:52 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Gallagheresque wrote: I lost the rings didn't i. Stopped the wedding for 15 minutes whilst i was desperately looking for them, total wreck i was. Only joking Everything went great, i gotta few laughs but a few groans with the hope your marriage lasts longer than a Liverpool title challenge. Me and the Groom looking dapper. The happy couple together..beautiful.....

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Author:	Squidge [ Sun Jun 22, 2014 12:24 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Gallagheresque wrote: Bert Trautmanns neck brace wrote: And dont suggest they call the sprog Stevie Now i must get in a slight dig about Liverpool. How about hope their marriage lasts longer than Liverpools title hopes???? I did a best man speech for a Liverpool fan the day before the season started. I can't remember exactly but I went with something along the lines of "For N & J, today is a day where they can look forward to the future. For N in particular, he'll be looking forward to the next year full of optimism and hope, wondering what might be. Those of us with a bit more experience can tell him that within a month the usual nagging doubts, disappointment and pessimism will have set in...but enough about Liverpool's upcoming season, here's hoping the marriage is more successfull". Went down a treat for those who were football fans, clearly it's a joke where the punchline is obvious from ten miles away. For those who weren't football fans, there was a spell where they looked horrified and were clearly thinking "Fucking hell, he's going a bit off message here". I have never been so nervous for anything in my life. Then as soon as I stood up I was completely calm and it went really well. Weird how that happens.

Author:	Squidge [ Sun Jun 22, 2014 12:25 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Help!! Best Man speech ideas.
Gallagheresque wrote: I lost the rings didn't i. Stopped the wedding for 15 minutes whilst i was desperately looking for them, total wreck i was. Only joking Everything went great, i gotta few laughs but a few groans with the hope your marriage lasts longer than a Liverpool title challenge. Me and the Groom looking dapper. Also, well done!